You have moved your mouse, please reboot to make this change take effect
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Yesterday it worked / Today it is not working / Windows is like that
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"take USABLE from UNSTABLE and you get NT"
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"[It will] be very hard to increase browser share on the merits of
 [Internet Explorer] alone.  It will be more important to leverage
 the OS asset to make people use IE instead of Navigator."
             -- Christian Wildfeuer, a Microsoft Manager
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Security-wise, NT is a server with a "Kick me" sign taped to it.
             -- Peter Gutmann in the Scary Devil Monastery
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Windows NT was designed to be administered by an idiot and 
usually is...
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Bill Gates is a monocle and a white fluffy cat
from being a villain in the next Bond film.
             -- Dennis Miller
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Linux represents a best-of-breed UNIX, that is trusted in mission
critical applications, and - due to its open source code - has a
long term credibility which exceeds many other competitive OS's. 
             -- Vinod Valloppillil of Microsoft
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I previously had IE4/NT4 on the same box and by comparison the
combination of Linux / Navigator ran at least 30-40% faster
when rendering simple HTML + graphics. 
              -- Vinod Valloppillil of Microsoft
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Although UNIX is more reliable, NT may become more reliable with time.
              -- Ron Redman, deputy technical director of the Fleet 
                 Introduction Division of the Aegis Program Executive 
                 Office, US Navy.  
Where is the line between mere incompetence and actual treason?
              -- jcr
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Microsoft is a cross between the Borg and the Ferengi.  Unfortunately,
they use Borg to do their marketing and Ferengi to do their programming.
              -- Simon Slavin in a.s.r.
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IE brings the web to Unix...
isn't that like Ronald McDonald brings religion to the Pope?
              -- Seen on Usenet
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The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armor to
lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores
the fact that it was he, who by peddling second-rate technology, led them
into it in the first place. 
               -- Douglas Adams
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This just in.  In Microcruft Word 97 type "I'd like to see Bill Gates
dead." and highlight it.  Now ask for a synonym.  It offers: "I'll
drink to that".  Dissention in the ranks!
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In MicroSoft Word 97, highlight "unable to follow directions" 
and hit Shift-F7.

I wonder what job longevity this wit has.
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On the other hand, O'Reilly's book about running W95 has a toad as the
cover animal. Makes sense; both have lots of warts and croak all the
time.
               -- Michael Kagalenko, 6.Aug.98 
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My current computer, in addition to 'DOS,' has 'Windows,' which is another
invention of Bill Gates, designed as a security measure to thwart those
users who are somehow able to get past 'DOS.'
               -- Dave Barry
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Windows has detected that a gnat has farted near your computer.
Press any key to reboot.
               -- Simon Oke in the scary devil monastery
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In 1984 mainstream users were choosing VMS over UNIX.  Ten years later
they are choosing Windows over UNIX.  What part of that message aren't
you getting?
               -- Tom Payne
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In short, just as the Multics mentality of careful access controls
shows up throughout Unix, the cretinous CP/M mentality of uncontrolled
havoc shows up in DOS and all its mutant children.
               -- Tom Christiansen
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Now there is an even better way to ensure one corrupted data file
spreads to all other data files on the same network:-
we call it OLE 2.0.
               -- Bill Gates (alledgedly)
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I believe OS/2 is destined to be the most important operating
system, and possibly program, of all time.
               -- Bill Gates, 1987
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Windows 95, the most installed system in the world,
I know, I've done it 5 or 6 times myself.
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Windows 95: n. 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell for a
16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for
a 4 bit microprocessor, written by a 2 bit company that can't
stand 1 bit of competition.
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"You have to understand," he said, "that Windows was written by
children. Some of the children were very bright, but most of them
could have used a lot more adult supervision."
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Customer: I'm running Windows '95.
Tech:     Yes.
Customer: My computer isn't working now.
Tech:     Yes, you said that.
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Proof Windows is a Virus:
	It is very widespread,
	It eats up your disk space,
	It slows down your computer,
	It takes control over your computer,
	It performs disk access at random times,
	It displays silly messages on your screen,
	It randomly crashes the computer
             -- Vesselin
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Q: What's the difference between MicroSoft Windows and a virus?
A: Apart from the fact that virusses are supported by their authors,
   use optimized, small code and usually perform well, none.
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Supporting Windows is like buying a puppy.  The dog only cost $100,
but we spent another $500 cleaning the carpet.
             -- Marc Dodge, "Reality Check",
                _Open Computing_, December 1994
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DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy,
and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70
million machines in use wordwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand,
may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that
numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.
             -- New York Times, November 26, 1991
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In a sense Microsoft is sort of the McDonalds of the
computer industry.
             -- Jeremy Reimer
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Gone are the good old days, when we were discussing whether mounting
a Windows NT machine was S'n'M or necrophilia.
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MSDOS didn't get as bad as it is overnight --
 it took over ten years of careful development.
             -- dmeggins@aix1.uottawa.ca
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The only reason Gates is still alive is because Ted Kaczynski wasn't ever
forced to use Microsoft products.
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